“God proves our sonship by disciplining us (Heb 12). Children honor their parents by assuming that their rules and curfews and chores are intended to bless them, even if they can’t see how” (69). “We trust God to provide for us, to do good and have our best interests in view.
God doesn’t always give us an explanation up front that we deem sufficient, but we know that he loves us and that he is good, and that is enough. While far from being omniscient and infallible, our parents can help us avoid unnecessary heartache and sin if we will only humble ourselves and admit our need for wisdom Leithart explains, “The Hebrew word ‘glorify’ comes from the word ‘weight.’ To honor parents is to give weight to their opinions, presence, and advice…Children honor them when they acknowledge their parents have wisdom they lack, when they allow themselves to be led in the way that leads to life” (68). But do we adopt a posture of joyful service and obedience toward our heavenly Father, who is our our Maker and Lord? Do we serve Him with honor or begrudgingly (cf. Leithart asks, “Do you speak well of your parents, or do you criticize, grumble, and pretend you know better” (68)? Do we thank our parents for providing for us, teaching us, putting up with us? Or do we harbor bitterness toward them, only remembering and proclaiming their mistakes and failures? The practical significance of this command, Leithart explains, is filled out by asking the question: How do we honor God? By considering the way we give glory to our heavenly Father, we see more clearly what keeping the fifth commandment actually entails. When this command is understood as one of the five connected to love for God, it helps us see that honoring one’s father and mother is more than simply doing what they say. In his article on the structure of the Ten Commandments, David Baker agrees with Leithart’s 5+5 pattern, adding that honoring one’s parents is a fundamental virtue which seems to follow the commands to honor God, his Name, and his Day. They way you treat them should resemble the way you respond to God” ( The Ten Commandments, 68). Your parents aren’t God, but they’re God’s gifts to you, as you are God’s gifts to them.
Leithart observes that, “The Hebrew word for ‘honor’ means ‘glorify,’ which Scripture uses to speak of honoring God. Grouping the fifth commandment with the first four is not only for grammatical or stylistic reasons, however. 20:12), belongs to the group of commands that focus on our love for God. This suggests that the Fifth Commandment to honor your father and your mother (Ex. Leithart notes that each of the first five commands names Yahweh and gives a rationale, warning, or a promise for keeping them (cf. One of the unique contributions that Leithart makes in his reflection on the Ten Commandments is a rather compelling argument for dividing the Ten Words into a 5 + 5 pattern, the first five concerning love for God and the second half love for neighbor.
HONOR YOUR MOTHER AND FATHER SERIES
There is much to commend with this little book and the series of which it is a part, but his discussion of the fifth commandment and how we honor our father and mother was particularly insightful. Peter Leithart, a prolific author and president of the Theopolis Institute, has written an excellent and concise treatment of the Ten Commandments, showing how they are, as the subtitle puts it, “a guide to the perfect law of liberty.” He unpacks their importance and relevance for Christians today as well as their connection to Jesus Christ, “the heart and soul of the Decalogue” (6).